Should I be worried?
Approximately 50% of people will develop some form of cancer in their lifetime and
most of us know someone who has been impacted by cancer in some way, so with this in mind it’s easy to see why someone might be concerned about developing cancer.
However, as normal as it may be to worry about it, it’s often not helpful. Not all
cancers are preventable, meaning we have no control over them. Some are preventable which gives us some control. It boils down to looking after the body we have been given and minimising the risk as much as is reasonably possible.
Things like:
- Having a healthy diet (occasional
treats are fine!). - Keeping active.
- Stopping smoking.
- Being sensible with booze.
What if I’m diagnosed?
Finding out you have cancer can be a shock and it’s important to take time to process and work through any difficult feelings or emotions.
Speaking about the treatment plan with your doctor is vital but it’s also important to take note of your mental health.
The shock, stress, worry and uncertainty of cancer can have a major impact on our mental health and it’s a good idea to speak to someone about this.
There’s nothing wrong in speaking with a friend or family member initially but the best step is to speak to a professional. The NHS have resources to help with this or you can speak to an employee assistance program, a charity or a private therapist for support.
The important thing is to keep talking, asking questions and don’t bottle up emotions and thoughts. This isn’t a fight to be fought alone.
Supporting someone through cancer
1. Take your cues from them
The person with cancer may be happy to speak openly or even joke about it, or they might not want to talk about it at all and focus on something else. Don’t be afraid to ask what they would prefer to let you know if talking about it is getting too much.
2. Silence can be golden
You might feel pressure to have to say something but it can be more helpful to just listen attentively. Avoid distractions, keep an open body position and give them your time.
3. Be open and honest
Saying “I don’t know what to say” is better than just saying nothing or avoiding contact altogether. Phrases like “I’m here to listen if you want to talk” and “Can I help with anything?” are helpful, whereas phrases like “I know how you feel” or “You’ll be fine” aren’t always helpful.
4. Ask before giving advice
You might have a suggestion that you feel is helpful but not everyone wants advice and what is right for you might not be right for them. Ask if it’s OK to make a suggestion before throwing advice at someone.
5. Is practical support available?
There is a whole host of different organisations and charities that people might not know exist or think to use. Macmillan has loads of information and Cancer Support UK has a lot of practical tips and resources. There’s also resources for financial support, relationships, young people, women, men, employment and bereavement which you can find here.
Weekly Wellbeing Tip
If you’re worrying about something but don’t know what to do about it, create 2 columns – the first is things you can directly control about the situation (sometimes this may be empty), the 2nd column is things you can influence.
